Barfy McBarferson

So throwing up at home is not too much fun either.

I KNEW that if I actually got pregnant I would be sick. I get nauseous easily: car rides, boat rides, roller coasters, merry-go-rounds, etc.

People at work are starting to ask questions. Questions like: why is Brenda about 2 shades fairer than she normally is. Thus making me almost transparent.

However, before you may/may not become envious about the so-called Morning Sickness. Let me relate a story to you.

This morning, I was staying at home for a while whilst I tried to let my stomach settle. I had already eaten a granola bar, had some crackers, a glass of milk and a glass of juice. I tried to get ready for work, but I just kept feeling sicker and sicker. At one point, I moved to the restroom to see if that was my problem.

Nope, just a little gassy.



BUT THEN....


I was immediately overwhelmed with the need to release my breakfast, that I had no time to pull up my pants. I just flipped around and stuck my head in the toilet.

I took a deep breath....and realized that I had, in every sense of the word, farted. in. my. own. face.

Then I puked my guts out, because every time I took a breath, I inhaled more fart.

Goooood Times.